Saturday, April 22, 2017

The Warrior’s Studio, with Blitzed Wolfer Vol. VII

  Agent 54 here again with another installment of Blitzed Wolfer’s terrific interview series.  Who knew Blitzed would outlast Bill O’Reilly?

  Today’s interview subject is kind of a happy accident and a social experiment at the same time.  Let’s check out what Knucklehead Ned, formerly of the infamous Spacebeard crew, is up to now.

Blitzed:  Welcome to The Warrior’s Studio for our 7th edition.  I bumped into Knucklehead Ned, the former First Mate for the infamous space pirate, Spacebeard and he graciously agreed to join us here today.  Please welcome Knucklehead Ned.

Audience:  Mild applause

Ned:  Aye, how ya doin?

Blitzed:  Quite well.  I noticed you seem to have an unique way of expressing yourself  Knuckle, or do you prefer Head or, uh,  I apologize, what do I call you?

Ned:  Argh Ned, will do just fine and fuggedaboutit!

Blitzed:  Yes, it seems that you have picked up some of the local vernacular in your brief stay here in New York City.

Ned:  No, the wench at the clinic said I was doin ahh-ight
   
Blitzed:  No, I meant that you have adopted some of the phrasing and accents found here.

Ned:  Aye, I’ve loined a ting or two from my new mateys in the Savage Skulls club of da Bronx.

Blitzed:  Oh my, the Savage Skulls?  Aren’t they a vicious criminal gang?

Ned:  Argh, I’d say they be more like mischievous than vicious, ya know what I’m sayin?

Blitzed:  Not exactly but, let’s move on.  Okay so, do you miss your swashbuckling about the galaxy days with Spacebeard?  Tell me why you left your crew.

Ned:  Argh, the question be, why did they leave me?  Aye, sometimes I do miss microwaving the Captain’s Pepperoni Pizza and hanging out with Smelly Pirate Space Hookers but, me new mateys and I be chillin in the crib and smokin blunts. Yo Ho!  It’s more fun than a barrel of space rum.

Blitzed:  So, you’re not going to rejoin Spacebeard and pilfer Pepperoni Pizzas from Darth Vader and the Empire anymore?

Ned:  Argh, I’m sure when they get to noticin I ain’t around and when the coast is clear, Captain Spacebeard will come about to beam me aboard and it’ll be just like olden times.

Blitzed:  Yes well, the coast better be very clear because we just got rid a nosey official from The Empire who was asking a lot of questions about stolen Pepperoni Pizzas.

Ned:  Yo!  You know, snitches get stitches. What exactly did you tell da man

Blitzed:  Oh don’t worry.  I made up a BS story about a failed investment in an Italian restaurant in Queens.  He bought it hook line and sinker. 

Ned:  Aye, I did hear that ye be full-a-shit but, I better not hear nuttin about you singin like no boid.

Blitzed:  (nervously) Honestly, I didn’t tell ’em nuttin,,,I mean anything.  I can keep my beak,,,uh,,, mouth shut.

Ned:  Aye, of course ye can.  Hey don’t get noivous, fuggedaboutit!



Wow!  Who woulda thunk a few dozen stolen Pepperoni Pizzas would still be giving Blitzed indigestion all these months later.



28 comments:

  1. Heeheehee! Blitzed had best watch what he does for the sake of "investigative" reporting.

    Have a blessed and beautiful Sunday!

    ReplyDelete
  2. aarrgghhh me heartys I do love a good pirates tale :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad you enjoyed it.

      Thanks for playing.

      Delete
  3. I think he told them more than he's admitting. I'm just saying.

    Have a fabulous Silly Sunday. ☺

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You can't be too careful, ya know what I mean.

      Have a great week.

      Delete
  4. I believe him honest I do ..didn't say a word....LOL

    Have whoopstastic Sunday & thanks for your visits :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Then Blitzed has nuttin ta worry about.

      Thanks for visiting and commenting.

      Delete
  5. Nothing like a pirate. Especially a lego pirate!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yo ho and a bottle of Rum.

      Thanks for playing.

      Delete
  6. nothing beats a night out partying with smelly pirate space hookers. I miss my 20s sometimes

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Everybody loves Smelly Pirate Space Hookers.

      Thanks for playing.

      Delete
  7. Wikileaks has a big expose lined up just for Blitzed Wolfer. I saw it on twitter.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can't wait to read about it.

      Thanks for playing.

      Delete
  8. Stolen pepperoni pizzas? Very inventive, Agent 54. I love Wolf!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. We should get together for some stolen Pepperoni Pizza sometime.

      Delete
  9. Lol, nice one!
    Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes :)
    Debbie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad you enjoyed it.


      Thanks for visiting and commenting.

      Delete
  10. Oh Agent54 the stories you do tell. Thanks for sharing on #FridayFrivolity

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Glad you enjoyed it.

      Thanks for commenting.

      Delete
  11. "Loined a ting or two" - snort! Fun as always, Timothy! #FridayFrivolity

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  12. Hilarious

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey sis, glad you enjoyed it.

      Please come back early and often. Miss you.

      Delete
  13. It's 8:20am, and now I want Pizza :oD
    Thanks for linking up! Happy Wednesday!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Thank you for sharing at http://image-in-ing.blogspot.com/2017/09/orchids-endless-variety.html

    ReplyDelete